You

Written by:

     Melissa Pantall Hall

I was never the first thought,

Nor was I the last.

I'm not good enough for the present,

And I was not there for the past.

People come and go,

But it's you that I miss.

The touch of your hand,

And your soft gentle lips.

How you touched me,

No one has ever done.

A slight pull of my hair,

And you and I were one.

My heart is to big,

Even for my own good.

I fall flat on my face,

In the spot that you stood.

All alone now with tears in my eyes,

No chance of hellos and only long goodbyes.

11.11.12

Dear Night

Dear Night,

Be giving, So I get enough to wake rested.
Be patient, So I can fall asleep before the morning light.
Be quiet, So only my music can I hear.
Be soft, As a blanket and hold me tight.
As I drift off to sleep,

Thank You and Good Night,

Melissa Pantall Hall
11.15.2011

Friends

Friends
    Written by Melissa Pantall Hall

With every sense of your being,
The breath in your lungs, and the taste on your tounge.
The sound of the train, and the wet from the rain.
The feeling of cold, and once again it's not old.
The smell of fresh air, and the flower blooming out there.
The sight of a friend, and the sweet touch of sin.
It all comes again, with only a friend.

10.25.2011

The Pain

The Pain
  Written by Melissa Pantall Hall


I forgot how much pain can consume a person.
How much a person would do just to make the pain go away. 
Does it actually go away or does it heal in time? 
Does pushing it away make pain stronger and last longer and longer? 
Can you hide from pain, or turn it off?
It would be nice if you could. 
Turn it off, and not grow colder, more bitter, and worn. 
Push through it, only to find that it is stronger than before. 
Pain, 
A feeling a person must face and a lesson a person must take. 
If only to be happy inside and live life only to find pain once more. 
Pain will not be easier this time, 
At least in my mind.


11.15.2011

Am I Here To Stay?

I don’t know what my future holds,

Or goals that I should win.

I don’t know where I’m going,

And I don’t remember where I’ve been.

I’m lost in distractions,

Life so I’m told.

I can’t dream about the future,

Today consumes my soul.

My future seems so impossible,

My dreams so out of control.

I’m lost in my own footsteps,

And my heart was put on hold.

No one can tell me different,

Because each is to his own.

The very thought of companionship,

Is always far too gone.

So for what I’m supposed to do in this life,

I don’t really know what it is.

The trees are overgrown with strife,

And I feel more and more like a kid.

So please don’t tell me what to do,

My mind doesn’t work that way.

The greener fields will come and go,

But I am here to stay.

Melissa A. Hall

02.01.2012 

As You Wish

I always tell my mind,
One day at a time.
Once or twice it listens to me.

Thoughts that come and go,
Between days, weeks, months and years they flow.
Like a tidal wave crashing down on me.

The feeling I long for,
Like never before.
Someone close, but not so close.

I tried again,
This time with a friend.
One more short story down.

Feeling of emptiness,
Consumes my chest.
With a deep breath of relief.

I push away,
So no one will stay.
That is the objective I see.

I don't know how to hold on,
Only to be strong.
I keep my wings tucked away.

A little hint of sadness is all I confess,
The other is just pure recklessness.
So on with my days...

They are lonely sometimes,
At least they are all mine.
Some regrets, but not to many.

I guess it is the time of year,
Everyone full of cheer.
I will partake in some.

Chats with old loves never wanting to move on,
The feeling is oh so gone.
Came quickly one night.

As fast as they came,
It all turned to blame.
Again...

Maybe in my mind,
There is still time.
To move on without a blink.

My eyes are tired now,
My tears they flow,
Never under control.
For me that's ok.

At home alone I can be,
The one that on one will ever see.

As you wish



Melissa A. Hall
11.30.2011

The Storm That Is Me

Running for miles and I still can't stop the storm.

The storm that is me,

And it has been for all my history. 

I tend to question more and more all the decisions and all that I think.

The way I live my life and the goals that I seek.

I thought I knew what I wanted, but in life and with life things change.

What I thought was a big deal was actually not at all real.

What happen to the truth and the morals that you were told.

I have found in this world all of this has been sold.

Sold to Easy Street, Drugs, Booze and Gold.

And I wonder sometimes “Where the Hell did you sell your soul?”

I will hold fast to the things that I have learned in my life,

For this will be my legacy when I return from my flight.

The thing one remembers about folks in their life,

Is who made a difference and who put out the light.

As bright as I will shine for you,

Two lights I have put out,

No intentions did I bring, 

Or harm did I mean.

But what I have learned in this Cruel Life of mine,

As happy as I am,

There are evil people that are just in it for their plan.

I will hold fast to the things that I have learned in my life,

For this will be my legacy when I return from my flight

Melissa Hall

10.21.2011

Lightning Strikes Me

I'm going walking in the rain
I hear the thunder, and I see the lightning.
I am going walking in the rain.

Day after day and play after play.
Is today the day I win or loose?
As if I even have the right to choose.

Look at me and a smile you will see, but not in my eye.
The pain and hurt is all in the mirror looking back at me.

The Mirror...

The one that tells your true lies, you know the ones you try to hide.
The one you look into hoping for a change and all you see is nothing but the same.

I can not see what is waiting for me,
Nor do I care to know.

Because I'm afraid to say I would die if I knew,
What the strength is, I am growing into.

Today my friend is the start to an end,
And every day in between.

It's the mornings I see as I crawl off my knees,
And Thank God for the blessings that will be.

For I am still in my path of Present and Past,
And the future is not mine to see.

With this promise I can say,
Only my music, This pen, and Me,
Can truly take me to where I can see.

I'm going walking in the rain

I hear the thunder, and I see the lightning.

I am going walking in the rain.

Melissa A. Hall

07/06/2011

My Angels

Yesterday was hard as I could see the time he missed with you and me.
For the days grow longer and the nights keep adding up
For the days he could have spent with us.

Four years so far, it has been so hard to see the things that he missed.
The things that I could not have resist.

For birthdays come and birthdays go just like any day,
The only thing is I choose to stay.

As I watch my kids grow and bloom there is no way that I could go.
For the price I pay I must stay to see the ones I love be free,
And grow up just like me.

As they grow like weeds so fast and strong I see his face as I move on.
For there is no way I can change the time he missed and all the hugs and kiss.

For I will go and keep moving on and this is a must
For there is no going back just only the history of the past.

One day will come and the horn will blow and my days on earth will no longer show.
My God will be and take care of me just like it was mentioned to be.

With all that I have been through, and all the pain I know,
At least I know it's all mine, But I will still shine.

Grow strong and trust. Give of yourself like you would want to be given to.
Love with your all, and your all will be your love!

This might be the hard road, but with the knowledge and the morals that you know,
You TWO will also glow!!

Make a difference in this world, and stand up for your rights,
Make sure you have the information you need before you start your fight.

I will be here no matter what but we all know
Sometimes that's not how it goes.

So FOR now, it is day by day and bridge by bridge.
A sweet kiss and an I LOVE YOU every single night,
With a Hug that tells you, "You are never out of my sight!"

Love,
Mom


Melissa A. Hall
Started 5.28.2011 Finished today 6.28.2011

What am I looking for?

What the hell is wrong with me,
that I can not see what is right in front of me?


Looking on the outside, and searching from within,
and all that I have left of me is writing with this pen.


As the days fly by and all I do is cry,
all they do is see, that what is really just not me.


When my knees hit the floor and I can't take anymore,
I will pick myself up and go for one more.


One more day will come and go and only my blessings I will show.
For no one really really cares what lies beneath my only stares.


I have looked for a long long time,
to find what is looking back at me with my own eyes.


When I look, I see a little girl staring at me.


With no love to give and a cold heart to hide,
so no one will ever see on the other side.


An Angel some say, in a most Devilish way.
A toxic blend I will pay.


For this is me and I can not change
because that is all I see looking back at me.


Who knows what the future will hold, only my master I have showed.
What truly lies in me, Only my master can he see.


He guides me through my days and my penance is what I'll pay.


FOR I  CAN NOT SEE...WHAT IS LOOKING BACK AT ME.




Melissa A. Hall
06.16.2011